5 March 2015
[humor]
The
situation seems only too typical.
Honeybees in Northeastern France, moved by a sudden wave of creative
inspiration, began work on one of the most ambitious artistic projects in
history – or, at least, in honeybee history.
THE DISGUISED OPPORTUNITY
One day, a foraging honeybee smelled sugar. And bees, well, they can’t resist anything sweet. Pursuing the smell to its source, the curious seeker was suddenly bedazzled by an unexpected sight. The source of the sugar smell was in a rainbow of colors.
The place
was Ribeauville, France, a couple of miles away from the hive. There, a bio-gas plant was “processing” M&M
Candy shells in all of their multicolored glory. The bee must have been stunned. Then, regaining her composure, she began gathering the multicolored
sugar. When she returned to the nest, she
added her share to the sweets gathered by the hive's bees that day. The bees did their own “processing.” And, when the sweets had been turned into honey, these bees got a surprise. A few of their sister bees had made contributions that seemed to be blue. When added to the already amber-yellow honey stores, this produced green honey.
BATTLE FOR ACCEPTANCE
One can only imagine what happened next. Certainly, the colony’s sense of propriety was shocked -- at first. Surprised and suspicious of this unexpected change, many bees were comfortable enough with the traditional brown tones of honey. A bright green? Well, that bordered on scandal!
But, as the days past, the rumblings probably stopped. Many of the colony’s workers enjoyed the new color. Bees are highly organized in their dealings with the world, and variety and diversity, are not so very common virtues in the traditional society of the honeybee.
But variety is the spice of life. Soon the bees were buzzing with interest and excitement over the new color. Some may have held out. But, then, when the hive's queen visited and pronounced the new green color delightful, it became the “this season’s rage” in Northern France.
MORE COLORS
But the hive was in for another surprise. The new green color was a combination of the yellow of natural honey with the blue of the new colored honey. As the colored honey increased, the green gave way to a true blue matching the shade of the M&M shells that provided the pigment.
This hive of bees was on its way to a rainbow of honey colors: yellow, green and, now, blue! The bees probably felt that their colony was in the forefront a new honeybee artistic movement. Maybe this was the dawning of a new artistic age of bee culture: a honeybee renaissance.
UNFAVORABLE ATTENTION
Little could these poor honeybee artists have realized that they were being watched by unseen eyes. Jealous eyes. Human culture welcomes and evolves with variety and change – at least -- as long as humans are the authors of the innovations.
Undoubtedly, in the early spring of that year, some food producer, somewhere, was adding an approved dye to honey to change its color from amber to green. Why? Saint Patrick’s Day celebrations. What could be more expected in the season of green beer, bread, and green just about everything else?
When human beings do it, its fine. But when honeybees threaten to steal the creative spotlight from human artists, the game changes. France has official “Standards of Honey Production.” The honey of our artistic bees “deviated from the standard color of honey.” The blue honey of the Ribeauville bees was banned.
If a human processor wants to add green or blue color to the honey, later, . . . no problem. To that human processor goes the credit for the innovation and the profits from the sales. Apparently, honeybees are not allowed to create different colored honeys themselves. If the bees try to do it, naturally, they will be stopped!
Of course, this hurt not only the creative bees, but the beekeepers. Undoubtedly the beekeepers pleaded the case of their artistic bees. Why can’t the bees color the honey themselves? Surely, this unwelcome, second appeal caused some irritation. So, an almost forgotten regulation was retrieved from the bottom of the closet, dusted off, and used to silence the artistic bees once and for all.
That regulation states that honey is only honey if it is entirely obtained from the nectar of plants. No matter that processors could add dyes to the honey later. No matter that the processors' dyes weren't from "the nectar of plants"! The regulation was cleverly written to assure that bees can add nothing to honey.
So, the honeybees were not allowed any original contribution. Their job was to gather nectar and make amber-yellow honey. Then, after all the work was done by the honeybees, it’s the job of human processors to add colors and gain the profits and credit for these innovations.
With this kind of repressive environment, you have to wonder what’s really going on with decreasing honeybee populations these days. The cause, CCD (Colony Collapse Disorder), is not defined in terms of the confirmed bee deaths. Rather, bees leave the hive and never return. Everyone assumes that these absent bees have died. But, again, you have wonder. Maybe the bees are just tired of the drudgery.
Maybe, somewhere, in a clearing in the midst of some forest or on a plateau lost in some remote mountain range, swarms of disaffected bees have gathered after they just “dropped out” of mainstream honeybee culture. Retiring to these concealed sanctuaries, these bees have formed their own artistic and intellectual communities unfettered by the conventional roles forced on them by human society and the mores of traditional beekeeping culture.
Wherever that lost world may be, just imagine. A land full of honey in a rainbow of colors. A land where honeycombs are built in just about anything and given a variety of novel shapes. Bee colonies (or communes) experiment with new honeycomb arrangements hoping to discover a new feng shui of hive design. Bumblebees roam free over ranges of natural grasses – ranges never despoiled by lawn mowers, industrial agriculture or, worst of all, the evils of outdoor landscaping!
At any rate, the artistic bees of Ribeauville may soon attract more unwelcome attention from government authorities. More questions will be asked about the source of these bees’ artistic inspiration. Sinister questions. It all starts with the color blue or, rather, blue honey.
Once upon a time, there was another kind of “blue honey.” It was called psychedelic honey. And the question may be asked, “Are the artistic bees of Northern France just artists or are they psychedelic bees?" But here, "psychedelic" doesn’t refer to a type of art. The term has a darker meaning.
BACK TO THE 60’S
There’s
another way to make honey turn blue. It
involves a mushroom. A particular kind
of mushroom. With a little aging, psilocybin
mushrooms ground up and mixed with raw honey will turn the color of the honey to blue. Not only does the blue color escape into the
honey, so does the psilocybin. What is
psilocybin? One of the more potent,
natural hallucinogenic drugs popularized in the 1960’s. As late as 1996, jars of blue psilocybin
honey were confiscated at the border between Holland and Germany. Could the Ribeauville bees have been involved in the drug trade!? I doubt it. Their hives, honeycombs, and ability produce honey of any color would have been affected by rampant drug use. I don’t believe that these honeybee artists started their renaissance under the influence of hallucinogenic drugs. The accusation is just one more attempt to stifle honeybee creativity.
I would
like to see these poor bees allowed the freedom of artistic creativity they
deserve. A rainbow of honey colors is absolutely delightful -- particularly in a culinary world in which decorative colors are added to many, if
not most, foods. At the same time, I hope
these bees keep a good perspective on the reach of their creative vision. I have to admit that I have a more
traditional side. At least, I prefer my
bees in yellow and black. 
"The French Connection"
Beatnik
feng shui
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